20 miles... and by that I mean...

6. 6 miles and a bacon cheeseburger... of course! So for the last week it has been HOT on the trail... hot in the day, occasional rain at night. The other day we planned to do 20 miles and set ourselves up for an easy day into Erwin, TN. But... we woke up to wet tents... walked about 3 miles... and found a nice sunny parking lot to put our wet stuff out to dry in. Then also learned there was a diner a few miles away... and our 20 mile day turned into 6 and bacon cheeseburgers were to be had all around. SCORE!

It made me think how unexpected life can turn out... 20 miles turned into 6, another lunch of clif bars and peanut butter became a town meal... and life is good.

How often do we get so stuck in our thoughts and plans and ideas of what should happen that we miss great opportunities to be spontaneous and see what God puts in our path?

I'm as guilty as the next person... often stuck on my perfectionist, work-aholic, ridiculousness tendencies that I forget to be open to the unknown, the beautiful, the amazing things God has in store.

This whole trip has been unexpected and amazing... just today we were talking about trail habits that won't be socially acceptable back in real life... like talking to people while brushing your teeth or (gross but true) snot rockets.... but I hope being open to immense and amazing possibiilities is something that'll stick around... cause I like bacon cheeseburger kind of days!

ps. mile 340... and counting....

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Hot Springs, NC

Let me tell you a little story about what is in Hot Springs, NC... NOTHING.  Seriously.  OK, there is a diner and the Appalachian Trail goes right through town... literally down the sidewalk, but the whole town is about 4 blocks long.  Seriously.  Yet, here I am spending a day in town, sitting around, doing laundry, buying food for the next 4 days... the usual... zero days, SO NICE!

Seems I should have something important to tell you having reached nearly 272 miles... but I don't.  I rolled into town yesterday around 1 pm... EXHAUSTED.  The weather has been hotter, the mountains don't seem as tall, but I am TIRED... tomorrow I will have been hiking for 4 weeks... INSANITY!!!  I needed a day off to NOT hike, to sit, to watch the world go by... even though there is NOTHING in this town, it is nice to just BE.

I wonder how often I should do that in real life?  How often do I intentionally just SIT?  How often do I just BE and let the world go by?  I get so caught up in DOING, I get so caught up in needing to ACCOMPLISH, I get so caught up in WORKING... sometimes I even feel guilty when I am not doing things... I feel a bit selfish spending time on me, when there is so much to be done and so many people I could be serving and helping....

I think that is an important lesson I am learning on this sabbatical journey.  I am learning tha I can't stop the world around me, but I can stop me for a while.  I can sit and refocus and be still.  Everyone needs that some times... everyone needs to just slow down and BE.

So tomorrow, when I am not just BEING anymore, I will need to spend some time thinking about how to put this practice into my life at home... how to just BE and not feel guilty, how to REST and not always be on GO.

There you have it... profound thoughts from Hot Springs, NC.   =)

Answering the question why....

In the last few weeks I have had to answer the question "why" a lot... why are you hiking mostly. I am never sure what to say... I am hiking because it's something I've always wanted to do. I'm hiking because it's peaceful and challenging at the same time. I'm hiking because it seemed like a good ide at the time. I'm hiking because... it's what I'm in the mood to do...Some days are HARD... some days are easier... since we left the Smokies and cold weather, most days are HOT! The scenery is AMAZING and crazy beautiful I hike because... I can and its there... why not?

It also makes me think about why I am working for the church. Why do I do what I do?

Because... thats the simple answer... because I feel called to it. Because its the job God has given me to do. Some days its hard and I am tired... and some days its fun and crazy... but I love all those times... its learning to live the balance I am striving for. If you ask me "why" these days I willl tell you simply... I do it because its the only thing I can find peace and happiness doing... as crazy as things get, it's where I am called to be.... and there is peace in finding your place.

I am blessed.

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20 miles, bears... and what love looks like...

As I have been walking the last few days I have been thinking about a variety of things... among them, I have been thinking about what love looks like.
I've been out here now for about 3 and a half weeks, and one thing that's really defined my time out here are the people i spend time with. The guys I walk with are really different from me. We dont have lots in common, but we laugh a lot together and are doing this crazy trail together.
They are actually the reason I started thinking about what love looks like. They are really good to me. Today (and lots of days) when the hike is long they will stop along the way until I catch up and make sure I'm ok. They'll wait around for me to head out in the morning, they'll occasionally wash my pot or get my water. They'll get my food bag from the bear line when they get there's. They dont take care of me but they watch out for me. They're a blessing to me even though they don't realize it.
What does love look like? I want my life to be lived and remembered for the way I have loved. More than anything my heart's desire is to love others... to care about and for people.. to show them God's love in the way I love. In a lot of ways I define these guys I walk with by the way they love (whether they realize that is what they are showing or not!)... I want to love well. Even in simple ways... every day.
ps. I am staying tonight at a shelter where there is an "active" bear... but I think he's no showing tonight, of course... and I walked 20 miles to get here... no. seriously!
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164 Miles

Well... here I sit at Fontana Dam 164 miles from Springer Mountain.  It's been raining all day and actually for the last few days... and so we are hanging out at a hotel here for the night.  It's supposed to keep raining for the next few days, but we are heading out into the Smoky Mountains tomorrow no matter what.  Crazy times.

I would like to tell you that I have had some great epiphany in the last few days.  My friend Faye asked me what God has been teaching me about and leading me to in the last few days... and I didn't have any big things to tell her... I feel like I am walking and walking... and in the process maybe not learning anything earth shattering... except how to be at peace.  Peaceful is where I am today... feeling the peace of being in motion and having a goal that is only for me... I don't fell overwhelmed, I don't feel swamped... I am just in the essence of BEING.  And it is BEAUTIFUL.

So what is the sabbatical journey teaching me today?  It is teaching me that peace comes easily when there aren't things to overwhelm me... and that as I head back into my real life in a month or so, I need to be careful not to be overwhelmed... I need to choose to be peaceful.

A journey.

zero day!

I woke up this morning in the bunk house feeling double blessed. #1. because I was in a real bed and #2. because I am the only girl around and therefore I get a whole room of the basecamp to myself! score!!

Today I am taking a zero day at the Nantahala Outdoor Center (NOC), which means my plan is to hike ZERO miles... of course it also means I need to do laundry, by food, shower... and eat!! I guess its weird to need a day off from all my days off... but my knees and feet sure are liking this plan!

I went down to breakfast today and ran into my trail friend Tom. He's taking another day off so he can get on our hiking schedule. ("our" being me, Danny, Uncle Ray, Pat, and Patrick). We seems to keep accumulating people into our little trail family which means lots more laughter and fun. Plus, Tom hikes slower than me... so maybe Iwont be the last one into shelters anymore! hahahha

This made me think though about the beauty of simple friendship. We're walking the same path and therefore we walk together. No expectation that someone will carry the load for me, but simply walk with me. They dont make my load lighter or mountains smaller, but they encourage me, suffer with me, and laugh both with and at me.

I am blessed both here and at home, and beyond, to have people who journey with me. So thank you!! Thank you for being willing to walk with me through the craziness. I am blessed by each of you. =)

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Hey hey, an update from my phone! Finally the kinks are figured out... well, other than the typos from using this tiny keyboard!

Today marked a big day on the trail... #1. I have now been out here for 2 weeks. Thats CRAZY! #2. I have now hike 135 miles... what the heck?! #3. I hiked 16 miles today, over 3 huge mountains and down a HUGE descent of nearly 2000 ft (elevation), to get a diet coke in Bryson City, NC... really though, that beat my previous high distance day of 12.5. My legs and knees are feeling it too... whoa!

Today I hiked alone a lot... and the temps were hovering near 90 plus ridiculous humidity... my 30 pound pack felt like it weighed 130 and seemed to produce its own heat. I rolled into town looking like trail had OWNED me today... a rough day.

But I thought a LOT about how this is really the story of my life... I carry so many things with me (figuratively), so many expectations, so many worries, so many things that I "need" to accomplish... and they're HEAVY, and I've gotten so tired... because I've let them and the path I walk "own" me.

I dont want that anymore. I want to find balance and peace and joy in simple things and accomplishments... I am on this journey of "sabbatical" to find a way to be that girl again... and its a tough lesson... and a hard journey.

I'm finding that life on the trail is a metaphor for so many things that I am struggling with... I promise to continue to share this journey with you. =)

love yas.

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I'm a genius!

Well... over the course of the last few weeks I have been trying to send updates to the blog... but it has come back to me every single time... very frustrating... until i found out that I have been sending them to the wrong address... I'm a genius!!

So... I haven't disappeared!!  I am still very much here... kinda!  I am currently in Franklin, NC staying at a shady hotel.  I know... just what you wanted to hear!  Really though, I came into town this morning after 11 days of hiking.  I left from Springer Mountain in Amicalola State Park in Georgia on Wednesday, April 27th.  I took two other days off in Neel's Gap and Hiawassee, Georgia.  I am hiking along the Appalachian Trail and as of this morning we had hiked about 108 miles.  WHAT?!  Seriously.

I met some fun people my first night out at Hawk Mountain Shelter... now, for perspective's sake, I will let you know (don't tell mom!) that the first night I was out was the night the huge storms blew across the south with tornadoes and huge damage... picture little old me, city girl, in my tent on top of a mountain while the quarter size hail and 65 mph winds blew... uh, yeah... good times!  =)  I survived though and have tacked on miles every day.

Now, you may wonder what this has to do with Sabbatical at all... I mean... huh?  But I'll tell you exactly what it means... I thought and thought about spending time doing retreats or conferences or anything to feel that "God connection" and try as hard as I could, I really couldn't find a way to make it work, nothing I really wanted to do... but hike the Appalachian Trail?  I've always wanted that!!  So, I packed up my pack and here I am 13 days and 108 miles later.

Sabbatical has come to be defined as something different for me now... more of a pilgrimage.  There are crazy high mountains to climb over, its hot, its cold, I sweat, I shiver, I STINK, and I slug my 30 pound pack up and over moutains all day, usually alone.  I have great people hiking with/around me who I didn't know 2 weeks ago but they watch out for me and laugh with me, encourage me and push me forward.  They are a blessing.

Although I didn't know really where sabbatical was headed when I walked out of SGUMC 6 weeks ago, and I still don't a lot of the time, I can tell you this... I feel God's presence with me more and more every day.  When I lay down exhausted in the shelter at night (or, more likely, in my tent) I feel peace... exhaustion and peace.  I pray a LOT out here... I walk like crazy and work my but off to get over those mountains... mostly on my own, at my slow girl pace...

And its beginning to feel a lot like my relationship with God.  There's much to be learned... I'm getting stronger every day... and there are hard times every day too.  God is pushing me... and growing me in amazing ways, ways I may never be able to fully explain.

So there you have it.  I am reading a book right now called Solitude and Silence by Ruth Haley Barton.  It's GREAT and its speaking to right where I am!!  I am off in the morning, hopefully by Friday we will be knocking on the door of Smokey Mountain National Park!!  Super excited!!!  I'm not sure how much longer I'll be out... we shall see.

Now that I figured out the RIGHT address hopefully my updates will be more regular!!  Hopefully *(when I have cell service!!)

I love you and miss you all!!!  I hope you are well!!!