Tuesday thoughts...

I have a book of quotes that I have collected, things other people have said that inspire me.  I love when people have the gift of words, of inspiring and motivating with the things they say.  I don't have that gift, so I amazed by eloquence.  Today I was searching for a quote for the youth mission trip shirts and found one that spoke to me (not for the trip, but for my life in this moment), so of course, I decided to share it with you.  Lucky you!!

"Risk more than others think is safe,

Care more than others think is wise,

Dream more than others think is practical,

Expect more than others think is possible."

yes, please.  =)

When the rules change...

Today I spent the day at Camp Whip Poor Will for our annual challenge course recertification testing.  This year it was pretty laid back and the weather was beautiful.  We used to test in March and it was always horribly cold and snowy.  I never mind climbing trees, but its an added bonus when I can feel my fingers and toes for the whole day!

I have taken the challenge course certification test 12 times... TWELVE... yep... you can add that up in your head pretty easily to see that that equals 12 years... wow, I'm old!  It's funny because today our instructor changed two things that I learned every year from my first year as a facilitator... #1.  When we spot we shouldn't be focused on protecting heads and necks, we should be focused on the "splat and smear" technique, which creates friction... yup, that makes no sense to you, but it TOTALLY does to me!  #2.  The last instructor on the course is now allowed to zip off the course.  WHAT???  After 12 years of thinking... hey, it would be easier to just lower gear and then zip myself but thinking that was an absolute NO NO... now we can... what the heck!!

After 12 years of training they changed the rules on me.  Not in a bad way, but a change none the less.

Its funny to me when things change.  I am not the most sentimental person.  I don't hold onto stuff and I don't hold to too many traditions... but something about rules... well, that's different!  I am a "rule breaker" a lot of the time, I like to push the boundaries a bit... but when you tell me repeatedly that it is a "rule" I will usually follow it... I'm a bit of a dork like that.  Then when the rule changes, it throws me off a bit. 

Today Paul (our instructor) told us that "Failure isn't always fatal, failure can often be functional.  The more chances we have to fail, the more likely we are to succeed."  In the midst of struggling through some things in the last week or so, I have realized how often my fear isn't that I will get hurt or that I will die... but that I will fail... or worse yet, someone will think I have failed.  As I think about some important things, I wonder what I could "succeed" at if I was a bit more willing to risk failure.

When the rules change, sometimes you get to do

something amazing that you couldn't do before.

When we overcome fear, sometimes we get to do

something that is way bigger than the risk.

Thinking.... about things that stand in the way....



Today...

For some reason I woke up this morning and was overwhelmed by my desire to be here:

Working up my motivation to get out of bed and be productive would have been much easier if I had people to tell me they were leaving me behind if I didn't get moving.  Today I woke up missing my friends:

Today when I woke up I was wishing I was heading down this path: 

But I'm not. 

I'm here in Ohio... working on some things for the mission trip and trying to be productive.

I just kept thinking all morning... maybe I shouldn't have gone hiking to begin with.

What if I never stop wishing I was there?

What if I never stop thinking about the journey I am missing?

I can function here.... I can be productive... and I can miss the trail too.

I CAN do both... I just have to convince myself its possible.

It has been good to be home and laugh and catch up.

It has been good to sleep in my bed and see my dogs.

Crazy trips to the lake with Faye to see Linds.... 

Those are good too. 

 I think I am in this very strange spot of saying... this is my real life... but the trail was my real life too.  It all CAN coexist.  I may shower now and wear clean clothes... I may not stink as bad or wear dirty socks every day... but I'm still the same girl I was on the trail.  I don't want to lose sight of that.  I don't want to lose what I found there...

I want to be hiking again and I think all the time about how to make it happen.

Something is very, very wrong with me!!
Just thought you should know the truth.  =)

Loving Well...

I don't know about you, but one of the things I struggle with is saying goodbye.  Not when I know I will see the person in the next day or two or even in the next week or month... I struggle with saying goodbye in open ended ways.  I hate the end of trips and happenings when I am unsure when or if I will see people again.  I'm just really bad at goodbye.  I'm really awkward and I usually just hide from it.  Sometimes I will refuse to talk about impending departure up until the last minute, pretending its not coming and I am not going to have to walk away.  Then, when the goodbye actually comes, I am often the first to high-five and walk away before anyone might catch me off guard.  If I do end up with a quick hug... well, tears sometimes follow.. and I hate crying even more than I hate goodbye.

Lame?  Perhaps. 

I just don't do it well... and honestly, saying goodbye isn't something I want to practice getting better at... so I don't do it!  However, I know it is important to say goodbye in ways that honor the relationship and friendships that I have.  I want to do that.  I just struggle with it.

Today I was in Louisville with my brother and his family when I found out that an old friend had passed away.  He's been sick for a while and I haven't seen him in a long time.  However, Weadock was someone I loved and looked forward to seeing at camp each August.  The very first time I spoke at camp he told me "Carly, that was ok.  Not great, but it was ok.  However, it was honest, and that's what you need to be if you are going to 'preach', you gotta be honest.  Oh, and you should be a stand up comedian."  I still smile when I think of that conversation. In that moment Weadock told me exactly what I needed to hear.  He told me that I wasn't the "pastor" that the rest of the clergy are, but that what I bring to the table is important too.  He told me that he believed in me and what I have to say.  I love that and I cherish that comment every time I speak.   Weadock and I were really different.  We didn't always see eye to eye, but we disagreed over laughter and smiles.  He always told me exactly what he thought and reminded me that I should always tell the truth, even if people didn't want to hear it.  I loved Weadock and I will miss him in big, big ways.

Weadock's passing got me thinking about saying goodbye... and loving well.  I have long told people that part of loving well is letting people know how you feel about them, reminding them they are loved, and not leaving things unsaid.  Even though I STINK at saying goodbye, I don't think there are many people who would doubt how I feel about them.  If we love others well we don't let goodbyes happen while things are left unsaid. We encourage people, are honest with them, and don't let them wonder.

Have I always loved well?  No.  Is it something I am striving for?  Yep.

Have I done a good job of making sure others know I love them?  I hope so!

I want to live love.  I want to love well.  I want to tell people how much I value them and not leave things to chance.  I want people to see that I love them, their uniqueness, and their presence in my life.  I am so very thankful for friends, and I want to be sure that they know it.

Weadock was a blessing to me.  He will be missed.

Too tired to sleep....

How can that be?  How can I be too tired to sleep?  Dunno, but I am!  I think my "sleep window" has moved back significantly, so when I find myself out late I have missed that "first sleep"... and I have no idea when the second one is coming... I hope its soon!

Today I hiked 4 miles and then got in my car, came home, and took a shower.  That's still weird to me, but it was the first significant hike I have taken since I have been home, so it was good.  I was giving the bum leg an opportunity to show me how it has healed... it failed pretty painfully, but I don't care, I want to walk!  So I did.  =)

This afternoon I went up to Lakeside with Faye to visit Lindsay.  It was rainy but we had a lot of good laughs, good food, and of course good coffee.  Then we watched probably the strangest concert I have attended in my ENTIRE LIFE (and that's saying something!), seriously so weird.  Disturbingly so, but whatevs!

I have been thinking today about fear.  (Yup, I think about odd things at odd times!).  I have been thinking about fear in the context of being willing to face the things that scare me.  Not things like moving water or mice... but things like vulnerability, showing weakness, or failure.  I have never been good at letting people into my little bubble.  I don't like people to know what I struggle with or what might show I have weakness.  Yet this sabbatical time has been exactly that.  In order to get to here I had to put out in the open my shortcomings, weakness, and failure.  I had to be willing to say "I can't do this" and "I need help"... ahhhhh!  Two statements that are so very true and so very scary to admit at the same time.

In order for my sabbatical to START I had to be willing to admit that I was in desperate need of help, rest, and refocus.  Scary to admit, but very very true.  In the process of these weeks, as my journey has unfolded, I have had to admit that I am imperfect, vulnerable, and at times, lost.  I have gained a lot in these weeks.  I have learned that I am in fact not going to achieve perfection, that in weakness we learn strength and in being lost we surrender to being found.  I have also found that there are an awful lot of people on this journey with me, who never expected me to be perfect to start with.  =) 

I don't always learn lessons well the first time.  Sometimes I need to be beat over the head REPEATEDLY before I begin to understand.  I tend to be stubborn and desperate to be self sufficient.  I hate to have people see that I may not be able to handle EVERYTHING on my own.  Yet it is in facing fear that we learn where our strength comes from.  It is in admitting we can't and don't want to do this on our own that we find purpose and meaning that can only come from acknowleding that just maybe, God knows better.

And it is in falling down and getting banged up every now and then that we better understand God's grace.  It is in saying "I actually can't do this on my own" and "I can't figure out how to NOT keep screwing this up" that we learn to depend on a plan and purpose much greater than our own. 

Truly that is where I want to land... I want to land in the place where there are things much bigger than my own imperfection, where God's grace is more than sufficient for my weakness and where, even when I feel lost, I know that someone else knows EXACTLY where I am headed.

I live here...

Today I went to two very different worship services at two very different churches.   They were both good, in different ways and one of them was the church I grew up in.  It’s always nice to go back there… weird that they know so much about what is happening with me even though I haven’t been there in a while… but good none the less.  There is beauty in going home.  I spent a lot of time thinking and praying when I was hiking… but there is something about being in worship that I didn’t realize I missed so much.  It was good.  (Added bonus points that I went with my parents… they like it when I go to church with them, which only happens a few times a year… bonus points to the slacker daughter! hahahahahaha)

This afternoon I baked a new caramel brownie recipe for my dad (Father’s Day you know) and re-seam sealed part of my tent that had started to leak.  I also washed my pack (which was really, really gross) and sleeping bag.  I haven’t gotten around to putting everything away yet because a big part of me is holding out hope that I can hike again soon… possibilities….

My leg is feeling a whole lot better even though I still walk funny down stairs.  I do this weird lean on the wall thing.  I don’t know what’s up with that.  I guess I haven’t figured out how to walk down steps yet, who knows!!  The leg is still swollen a bit, but what’s a girl to do?  I can’t just sit around and do nothing!

This week I plan to go to Lakeside to visit Lindsay and to Louisville to visit my nephew… I mean to visit my brother and Katie.  =)  I’m hoping for coffee dates with a few people and just “doing my thing”.

I was thinking today a bunch of times about what I was doing last week at this time or about how a week ago I was getting ready for my last night on the trail.  I wonder how long that will last… that nostalgic feeling.   It’s funny because I find myself all the time (when people ask) saying… “My trip?  My trip was good.”  It’s hard for me to put it into any other words.

Was it perfect?  Nope. Was it painless?  Heck no!  Was it easy?  Uh uh.  Was it good?  Yup. Very good.

IT made me think about the idea of simple beauty.  I so often look for the big, the eventful, the ridiculous… but what surrounds me every day will so easily slip past if I don’t see the simple joy in today.  Do I wish I was hiking out of Pearisburg tomorrow?  Yup.  Is that my reality?  Nope!  Could I sit tomorrow and be sad for what I am missing?  Sure!  Am I sad?  Yes.  However, I can’t live in that place… that place of wishing and dreaming… it’s a slippery slope. 

Where I can live is in this place… where I say, yes, I wish I was there and hopefully I will get back there soon… I can say I LOVE to hear what is happening and I LOVE getting updates from hiker friends… but I also have to live HERE, because that is where I am!  I have to live these moments and embrace these gifts, because I don’t get another today.

I want to live with both the wishing/longing and the reality co-mingled.  There is beauty in dreams.  There is beauty in unknown possibility.   There is beauty in being right where you are… immersed in the moment you find yourself.

I want to love this day for what it is, in rainy, humid Ohio.   It may not be a mountain, but it is where I am for now… and I am blessed (and still dreaming…)

Telling the truth...

I've been talking to people lately... and well, if you know anything about me you know that if you put a cup of coffee in front of me and start talking I can sit for HOURS.  As long as the coffee lasts and usually beyond!  It's been interesting to me to hear people's questions about my trip and sabbatical journey.  While I love talking about my trip and sabbatical, I also love to hear what people are doing, what's been happening while I've been away, and what's on their hearts.  I know, I know... Carly loves to talk?  NO WAY!

However, since Monday night the most asked questions I get from people are... was it worth it?  Are you glad you went?   What did you learn?  So here you go...

Was it worth it?  200% yes.  I missed some things at home while I was away that I wish I had been a part of, but I wouldn't give up my time away for anything.  It was ABSOLUTELY worth it.  Every bit of pain, frustration, and struggle was worth it... as was every bit of laughter, beauty and joy.  I would do it again in a second... especially if I knew it could last longer.

Am I glad I went?  YES.  When I was getting ready to leave Brazil I was struggling with coming home.  A dear friend told me one day that we leave a piece of our heart behind every time we love.  The AT will long have a piece of my heart.  Not everyone has a desire to walk 500 miles or more... for some people it sounds pretty horrible I am sure... but for me it was exactly what I needed and much much more.  Big parts of me still wish I could be out there and I ABSOLUTELY will finish the whole trail... but for this season of my life the AT was right where I needed to be.

What did I learn?  I could go on an on... so many things I learned and am still processing.  I'm a thinker, a person who contemplates and dissects experiences... I don't always have the words to put them into good learning statements, but I know I will continue to learn from my sabbatical for a long, long time.  So, what did I learn?  I learned that peace isn't always found where we expect it and sometimes the biggest risks have the greatest rewards.  I learned that mountains (both literal and figurative) are meant to be climbed and journeys are meant to transform... and sometimes the hardest mountains to climb and the longest, toughest journeys teach us the best lessons.  I learned that friendship is a blessing that not everyone gets to have and we should be thankful for the gift.  I also learned that sometimes the people we love the most and that teach us the most are the ones that we don't expect it from.  I learned that it is a gift to have people who allow you to live big, ridiculous dreams and I am blessed with people who trust me, even when I seem ridiculous.  I learned that laughter and solitude are equally good for the soul and that sometimes we need to be in a place with quite literally no worries.  I learned that sometimes you have to "build a bridge and get over it" if you want to see the beauty of the day.  I learned that sometimes we need to "just let it go" and sometimes we need to say what needs to be said no matter how awkward it is.  I learned there are surprises in life we can't plan for and being willing to embrace life as it comes is the greatest lesson we can learn.  Most of all I learned that God has a plan that I can't begin to comprehend or plan and in being willing to take time to listen and follow even when I don't understand, I will find the most peace.

I learned lots of other things too... but for now, it's late and I'll save the rest for another day... a picture post is coming soon.

Love yas, miss yas, bye!

Answering a few questions... well, maybe more than a few....

In the last few days I have spent time with some people that I love and I seem to answer the same questions a lot... not that I mind, its just that people are curious.  It's funny to me because the questions people have aren't things I have even thought about.  SO, this here blog entry is just factual.  No extra deep thoughts... just a few things people have asked so I thought I would clarify.  ALSO, I'll still answer any questions, so if you have more ask them next time you see me.  If there is one thing that I love right now it is talking about hiking... since I can't actually BE hiking, I can talk about it.  =)  And we all know I love to talk!

Here's some answers for you....

# of Days I was gone:  47

# of Days I hiked:  41

Where I started:  Springer Mountain in Amicola State Park, Georgia

Where I finished:  Mt Roger's Ranger Station/Visitor Center near Marion, VA

# of trail miles hiked: 528

Most miles hiked in a day: 21.5

Average pack weight with 4 days of food and some water:  31(ish) pounds I think

Food I ate the most on the trail:  Ramen, ramen, tuna, and more ramen… oh and snickers and poptarts

Food I ate most in town:  PANCAKES, bacon cheeseburgers, ice cream and bbq

Favorite part of the trail to hike:  Grayson Highlands and the Smokies (even though it was cold, it was an awful lot of laughs and fun!), plus a couple amazing rock ridges that I climbed over were BEAUTIFUL (and we all know I like to climb over rocks to start with!)

Favorite surprise:  When the storm clouds broke just before I fell asleep on Cheoah Bald and Pat told me to come watch the sunset over the valley… and it was amazing.

Best Trail Magic:  Diet Dr. Pepper from the Baptist Church, it fueled my very fast and VERY obnoxious final 3 miles of a 21 mile day… and Iowa didn’t try to kill me (although he may have tried to run away from my hyperactive ridiculousness!)

Least favorite moment:  Saying goodbye on my last morning… and going to bed AND waking up shivering multiple nights in the Smokies.

Scariest Moment:  When I fell… and it was really just scary to others, it wasn’t as scary to me until after I realized I had lived!

Biggest laugh:  Listening to Uncle Rey and Iowa insult each other, while in separate tents in the rain… and walking with Iowa while he sang/quoted Napoleon Dynamite/told me “Gingers have souls.”

# of days I hiked all day in the rain:  1

# of times I cried: 0!

# of toenails lost:  one

# of blisters:  LOTS, and lots of duck tape used to cover them!

# of times I made fun of people getting lost: LOTS

# of times I was really lost: 2

Wildlife I saw:  lots of turkeys, 1 little mouse (in town!), chipmunks out the wazoo, deer, snakes, salamanders, lots o' wild ponies, and 2 bears.

# of times I told people I smelled bad:  MORE THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE!

# of times they agreed:  Every single one!

# of weird, weird people out hiking the AT:  Way too many

# of normal people out hiking the AT:  do normal people walk hundreds of miles?  I mean, honestly?

# of people I would go find right now and hike with for another 1500 miles: 2, for sure.

Where did I sleep:  In my tent as much as possible and in shelters when tenting wasn't an option or it was going to rain (carrying a wet tent is crummy).

How did I cook:  I have a little stove and fuel canister, but I only cooked dinner and it was usually ramen!

Where did I shower:  In town... every 5 or so days... hence the smell.  =)

Bathrooms?  Privies sometimes and sometimes trees... you can't be picky!

Did I lose weight?  Yep... apparently eating lots of candy and pop tarts is evened out by walking for 8-10 hours a day over mountains... who knew?!

There you have it... probably more than you want to know, but that's what you get.  =)

Learning to live in the balance

(At Grayson Highlands with the wild ponies... this picture makes me laugh...

and it is the perfect example of my tendency to be a little bit dramatic...)

Sometimes... SOMETIMES... I am a little over the top.  I MAY be a bit dramatic sometimes. 

When I laugh I often laugh until I can't breathe.  When I go for a walk in the woods, sometimes it ends up being 7 weeks before I come home.  If I get a little antsy for adventure, it has led me to buy international plane tickets.  When I want something chocolate, it would never disappoint me to eat a whole pan of brownies (I've never done that, but I think I would!).   

More seriously, when I do things I tend to want them to be perfect.

When I work I easily become a consumed by it.

When I get annoyed I slip over the edge to angry really easily.

When things bother me a little I easily let them become a big deal.

That's not healthy!  Some of it is my personality, I tend to be drawn to the big and dramatic.

But some of it is just an unhealthy habit or tendency that I have acquired over the years.

Here's something I have been learning during my sabbatical journey... I want to live in the balance.  Things like long hikes and searching for adventure and over the top laughter?  I don't mind those things at all and I don't think they're going anywhere.  Yet, my tendencies to get overwhelmed, angry, and frustrated?  I'd like to have more balance in my life in those areas.

When I was getting ready to leave for my hike (which was about 3 days of preparations, I admit!) I was so overwhelmed, even in my sabbatical mindset, and searching so much for balance.  My decision to hike felt a bit like running away and in some ways hiking took me to the other extreme.  What did I have to worry about?  How many snickers bars to eat today?  Where was the next water source?  How many miles to the shelter?  I mean, I had so few worries.

The reality is I would like to live my life a bit more in the balance.  I am who I am and some things about me aren't going anywhere.  Yet I can't (and don't want to) continue to live in that overwhelmed, weary, stressed out place.  I want to be able to keep things in perspective and be realistic.

How?  How do I do that? 

When I was hiking I realized something really important... I had these little strips of paper that were elevation maps.  I could see where the shelters and towns were and how tall the mountains were between me and them.  My friend would tell me things like "Today is divided in thirds, first third is easy, second third is going to be BAD, and the last third is just rolling hills" (he had a different perspective on rolling hills than I do, but whatevs!).  So, between those two things I knew what was coming.  I couldn't change it or make the mountains lower.  I couldn't go around the big things in my way or change how far I had to go, but I knew what was coming and could adjust my attitude for each piece of the journey.

I think a big part of learning to live in balance is to keep perspective of what is coming and where I am.  Some people say "This too shall pass".  That works for them, but what I want to say is "With God, I can do this too."  I don't want life to just "pass", I want to live and embrace it.  Some of my hardest and most important lessons learned are on those big mountains... and some of the greatest benefits come from climbing them, not avoiding them.

I want to live in balance.

(Laurel Fork Falls, Tennessee- Right before my big, dramatic fall down the hill... hahahahahaha)

Just because....

This morning I woke up at 6:30 AM. 

Yes, you read that correctly... I was in fact wide awake at 6:30 in the morning... except that since I don't have a tent to tear down or a pack to pack anymore I didn't quite know what to do with myself.  Weird.  I have never ever ever been a morning person.  NEVER.  However, I guess 6 weeks of being up and at 'em first thing in the morning is going to take a while to wear off!  (wink).

My thoughts are too jumbled, my mind too overwhelmed right now to tell you things that are deep and meaninginful.  It is still very, very, very strange to me that this is not a zero day and I am not hiking. I'm still trying to put it all together and figure it all out... I kind of feel like I am in a fog... strange.

SO, my camera battery died on the last night I was on the trail and today Lindsay sent me these two pictures.  SO I am sharing them with you... aren't you lucky?!

This is Patrick, me and Pat on our last morning. 

This picture makes me smile. A. LOT.

(even if that makes me a "real girl".)

This is Lindsay and I hiking in Grayson Highlands that same morning.

I was attempting to convince her that she should be an outdoors woman like me.

I do believe I MAY have convinced her... or at least started down that path...

Mountains are meant to be climbed... why shouldn't we be the ones to do it?

How did I get so blessed to have such amazing friends?

I may be all jumbled and confused, but I will tell you this...

I am a very very thankful jumbled and confused.

528... seriously

I'm really not sure where to begin to write about today... so I will start with this... 528. 

That is how far I hiked on the Appalachian Trail.  All the way from Springer Mountain in Georgia to the Partnership Shelter near Marion, Virginia.  I feel this blog has been lacking some photos (because you KNOW I am not tech savy enough to put pictures here with my phone!)... so I will give you this one to start.  528 miles, 47ish days... and I hiked them in these socks. 

Every. Single. Day.

Yup... you can gag a little... they're NASTY.  But they are also in a dumpster at the last shelter so don't worry they won't be showing up anywhere!

Aren't you glad I finally got around to putting pictures here??!!

Next up?  My AMAZING friend Lindsay, who drove all the way to Virginia to pick me up.  8 hours.  8 LONG hours... and she did it with a smile.  True friendship that is!  Here she is posing for a photo with my pack on the AT.  She was a super trooper and spent the night in a tent, on the ground, with my crazy AT "family" for a night, just so that I could spend one more night on the trail.

I don't think she can possibly know what a gift her being there, listening to 8 hours of my stories on the way home, meeting my friends, and climbing one last mountain with me was.  I am blessed. 

THanks Lindsay Lou!  YOU ARE THE BEST!

Finally, this is Grayson Highlands State Park.  (This is where Lindsay hiked one last mountain with me =)).  I had hiked through Grayson Highlands on Saturday morning and we went back after we left Marion.  It was AMAZING.  There are wild ponies and beautiful balds and rock outcrops and BEAUTY.  Seriously, one of my favorite parts of my hike.  AMAZING. 

528.

That's how far I walked.

That's INSANITY.

Late last week I hurt my left leg.  I really couldn't tell you what I did to it, but tonight it is swollen HUGE and gross, and it has been really painful to walk on... but I REALLY wanted to make it to that last shelter, so I hobbled through my pain... and I do LITERALLY mean HOBBLED.

My Appalachian Trail experience was AMAZING.  It was NOTHING like what I expected.  It was surprising and humbling.  It was challenging and peaceful, beautiful and hard.  I met people who I already miss more than I can express.  I didn't cry even once... I definitely didn't give up when I wanted to.  I may not be the fastest hiker, but I made it a whole lot farther than I thought I would.   Although a big part of me desperately wants to be a thru hiker, still out there and headed for Maine, my heart is still there.

I have much more to share here about the journey, many things to tell you about what I learned and am still learning... but I will tell you this... I miss hiking already.  I miss my trail friends and my trail life.  Although the journey was not what I expected, it was a journey that taught me a lot more than I could have thought possible.  I headed out alone and yet met amazing people that challenged and changed me.  I went to find peace and solitude and found more of both than I thought possible. 

You could say that living for nearly 7 weeks in the woods changed who I am... but the reality is that it will change me only as much as I let it.  The peace I found on my journey is only as real as I let it be.  The truth I found is only as meaningful as I allow in my life. 

I am not the same girl I was on April 27th, and that is the greatest blessing of all.

Much more to come...

Stopping to look...

Yesterday I was walking along, through the hot, sunny day heading for Damascus, Virginia. It's always nice to wake up in the morning on a town day... knowing good food, a shower and airconditioning are waiting. However this time town was 18.5 miles away... and that's an all day haul for a slow walker like me!

I was cruising along after lunch, sweating like crazy... and I came upon a sign in the woods marking the beginning of the Mt. Rogers National Forest... and the state line between Tennessee and Virginia. I stood and looked at it for 10 minutes... not crossing the line... amazed that I have now walked to VIRGINIA!! Whoa!!

When I got to town I told the guys that I had been so excited by the sign and they said it wasn't much of a big deal to them... maybe because they are hoping to go all the way to Maine, but it made me think. I thought about how often I miss out on the simple, amazing things in life because I am focused on something else...

How often does God provide simple, beautiful things for me? How often are my quick, simple pleading prayers answered and I don't acknowledge it? How many blessings do I miss because I am in too much of a hurry to "get where I am going"?

I want to revel in the simple, amazing beauty that surrounds me. I want to marvel at the blessings... I want to remember to be simple and thankful. I want to enjoy the days that I am living. =)

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400 miles doesn't make you a professional!

Today I passed a little stone 400 in the middles of the street... about 2 miles into my 17.5 miles day. That marker meant I have now walked 400 miles of the Appalachian Trail. WHOA! Well I guess technically its like 415 or something...

It was a good but weird day and there was a beautiful waterfall near the end. We even got some cold pop from a kid who was leaving... and headed around some very pretty trail to the shelter... when we got to the shelter it wasn't ver nice so we decided to head back down by the river to camp.

We went down some pretty steep steps and I fell BIG time... stumbled, dove, hit my knees and rolled... pack and all. classy. I was like a turtle with my legs all up in the air, weighted down by my pack. I know, I know. No, there isnt any evidence! Just some bloody bruised knees.

But it got me thinking... how often do i pretend that because I have been at this ministry thing for so long, I am some kind of old pro, immune to falling down and getting banged up?

I'll tell you this... as my 400 miles and bloody knees attest to, longevity and perfection aren't synonymous. I struggle now just as much... I fall down... I fail and make mistakes. I'm imperfect and in desperate need of God's grace.

But just like today, a friend came running, helped me up, brushed me off and I kept hiking... and laughing, because what else is there to do? God's grace is sufficient for all my mistakes and failure, so I get back up and keep trying.

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